My Life as A Radical Whore/Madonna

Many appointments… So much to do…

I’m pretty tired - waiting for Stella to enter into a reasonably deep sleep so I can put her down and (guess what!) pump. I may be able to get my hands on a more powerful pump, so perhaps that could make my life a bit simpler.

I had my second 6 week checkup today (today was with my midwife - last week was with my O.B.). All is well. My uterus is almost back to it’s original shape and my c-section wound is healing pretty well. It still gets a little achy sometimes. I’m down 24 pounds. And I feel good.

This week is all about figuring out how to travel outside our home by way of public transportation. So much crap to carry around - yesterday I had a backpack/diaper bag, a food bag, a car seat and of course the baby. There was a lot of stopping and adjusting. Today, I was able to do without the carseat and it made a big difference.

Good news! I am now able to increase breastfeeding at the breast to twice per day. I’m quite pleased and so is Stella. That also makes it easier for me to catch up with my pumping and general milk supply maintenance. I really hope that one day we can just breastfeed normally because it would be so much simpler. Anyone who tells you that breastfeeding is harder than bottle feeding is a fucking liar - trust me. All this mixing and heating and getting out of bed is a pain in the ass.

Anyway, gotta go get sleep. And milk. Milk first, then sleep.

Take care, everyone. I’ll write more when I can.

Atena McMilkyboobs

It’s raining. I wish I could just lie down and go to sleep and slip into the deep rain sleep. As it is, I must stay up for a bit, so Ian can get solidly to sleep and Stella can finish her latest meal. I’ll have to pump pretty soon, too.

Life is good. Stella fills me with sudden intense joy on a regular basis - especially when she smiles. It doesn’t matter that they’re “Gee, this is an excellent poop I’m having!” smiles, I still get excited when I see them.

Our personal network of friends and family continue to float us on a cloud of crazy freakin’ love and more support than a hundred dollar bra. We’ve been fed, clothed and carried through the past six weeks (not to mention the pregnancy before that), and the love just keeps comin’.

There’s a clinic appointment tomorrow morning - we’re becoming more adept at leaving the apartment. I’m trying to figure out which baby carrier will be the wisest choice for extended solo travel. I’m thinking I’ll use the Over the Shoulder Baby Holder. I’ve got her in it right now and I think it’ll work. It’s got a lot of padding, so I think it’ll be extra warm, too.

It wouldn’t be a complete post without some reference to my bodily fluids: I AM SO ANNOYED, because I think I’ve gotten my period. What a fucking drag! I’m expressing all this breastmilk - that’s all she’s getting, but I still end up getting my period at 6 weeks. How much does that suck? For those of you who don’t know, if a woman breastfeeds exclusively, on demand, her hormonal balance will create a circumstance where she may not have menstrual cycles for a while. This is called lactational amenorrhea. Because I am not able to nurse Stella at my breast, it appears that I’m going to miss out on this perk of exclusive breastfeeding. Suck ass.

Anyway, I gotta get ready to pump. I’ll try to check in again soon.

Love,

Atena Oyadi